Who am I

She sits heavy on my soul
She lives deep down within me
She has no name
Only she knows where she came
Or why she is here
I can't see her
Or feel her
And my heart is wrapped tight in her grasp

She protects me
And comforts me
I don't even know her name
I can't let her go
I can't let go
Until she says so
I feel so inbetween

I love her
Hate her
She only loves me
I feel ambivalent
And probably always will be
She has a desire
Mine is so different
She has a name
I have another
She longs and wants
I do it differently
She is quiet and unnoticeable
I holler and scream
She says she's here for me
I can't even see her
It doesn't stop her
I ignore her
She is my favorite person
I am hers
She is me

Written 8-25-05