Transcended Daze

So I hooked up with somebody
I moved on

I found happiness in a pretty girl's arms
It was wonderful

She's beautiful
Alluring
Captivating
Passionate

It was satisfying
Complete
Interesting
Hopeful

I gave everything I had
I left it all on the field
I yearned to be touched
I yearned for her love

I didn't hold back
Never second guessing myself
I didn't think of you
More than twice

Two unexpected
Unwanting times
You appeared before me

Beside her

I let it go
Let you go
Got back to the business at hand

Unleashed myself

Laying there in her arms
I realized a few things
Things I already knew
Things I didn't want to be true

I let it be
Enjoyed her company
Let it be
Let it be

I saw the truth

Hidden deep between she and me 

Right in the middle of the sheets

I saw what was right
And what wasn't

It was everything it could've been
It was everything it wasn't
It was everything I didn't want it to be
It was everything but you

It was incomplete
Frustrating
Empty
Meaningless

Only half way to as far 

As I was willing to go

It was only a scratch on the surface

Of all the passion bubbling up below

I couldn't let it all out

It was trapped

Love was the key

And I don't have it

I feel like I'm transcended
Like I'm dazed
Like I'm completely head over heels in love

With nobody new

Something I think you know

My transcended daze
Keeps me often in a dream like gaze
Floating around still deeply in love with you

The past ain't over over till it's over
But the future seems clearer now
I am moving forward
Getting on with my life

And yet something inside still persist
Something I thought was gone
Some thing I tried to break

But it won't go away . . . .

What to do?
What to do now?
Let it be
No. Yes.

It has to be
So I'll put you aside
As you asked me too
I'll give all myself to her

I'll pretend
I'll cope
I make my feelings secret
Even to me

Bury them underneath
Rotten and ugly things
Still at the bottom 
Of all that is not me

And I'll lie
Just like you
As if I can't have you
I suppose she'll do

Not the most romantic suggestion
Or even offering
That I could bestow
And pursue

But I am caught between
What is right for me
What's real
And how I truly fucking feel

I am caught between that
And this alternate universe
The one you created
When you chose to ignore

Ignore who we are to each other
How you really fucking feel
And what's truly between us
That even your lies can't break

So I have to pretend too
I didn't want to
But hey I have needs
I want things

I am amazing
Beautiful, Incredibly!
I have so much to offer
And NOW I am ready

So I guess I'll just hope
That forcing myself to get over you
Is the right choice
I mean it seems to have worked for you!

I will love her, eventually
It will never be the smack in the face
Like the one that happened
The first day I met you

It won't call me out
Or make me desire it
It might get boring
As it lacks that dramatic flare

But that's ok
I guess
I mean what choice do I have
I truly love you enough to let you go

And you have chosen, so there
It's happened
Please be happy
I am going to try too

She loves San Fran and LA
I can see us moving in a dream that might come true
When I am done with school
She likes the bass and I like it too

She's a Sag
Still fiery
Not as loud
But I am loud enough for both of us

2 out of 3
Isn't that how it goes
Life doesn't give you what you really want
It always falls short

I am supposed to be falling for her
But yet you always appear
I am feeling you
With every touch she gives

I guess it feels all right
Not quite the same
I wanted to wait till I was completely over you
But I don't think that's ever gonna happen

So I have to do what I have to do
Being single in this day and age
Is the same damn thing as being a stalker
Lol, but it's true

So as far as the world knows
I am over you
Good for me
I deserve it

She's all right
Pretty
I guess I can hang
She's in school for film production

Her true passion
Consequently, movies are also one of mine
I think we could make a great pair
All in good time

I like that, along with her green hair streaks 
But it's ok to not get it all
Life goes on
And so do I

I guess I'm just telling myself
The real truth
As I still know
Even though I can't really be honest

Many reasons
Life is complicated
But I think I have a future
Just a ways up ahead

Eventhough I don't expect to get rid of you
I guess maybe I'm still connected
You never seem to leave
Only closer and closer you become

I mean you're here
You're not going anywhere
And hey
I'm used to it