Letter to the editor

I don't think you quite get
The difference you make for me
The change in my life
That you make with even the smallest touch

I am forever changed
Changing still because of you
You are special to me
The connection we share is so unique

All you have to do
Is offer the smallest thing to me
The tiniest piece of you
And my life is completely improved

It is so amazing
And I feel so damn lucky to have that
Not many people get what we share
It is all coming in clear to me now

As before I could only see
What was wrong
Or all of my hurts from the past
All the ones I used against you

But after letting so much of them go
Forging a brand new trail with you
One that I can see clearly through
There is no longer doubt or uncertainty

It is all clear to me now
I see you clearly
And the part you play too
Without all the old doubt and fear

I know you have me put away
In some box
Labeled "Grey"
Or something obscure like that

Something you would never
Think to look in
A label that might remind you
To stay away

As what can you really do with gray?
People step over gray areas
The color gray signifies age
And most often gray is to be left alone

It is right to do so
Politically correct even
So this is my final resting place?
This box you know I can't breathe in?

But you keep me there
And something pulls at you
Something tells you things
And I feel turmoil for you about me

I see what you aren't willing to
My box for you is labeled free
As you are free to be inside me
And free to never see me again too

I don't make anything for you
I just am for you
Just with you
Now

You would say many things
You are happy
We gave it our all
It didn't work

But you have no idea
What it is I can do
Or who I am
All you have is memories of what was

You would tell me to move on
As you have found someone
For the first time who really gets you
Who really makes you happy

I smile now just at the mention
As I know the truth will reckon
I know what it IS
For you and me

I know it is easy with her
You don't even go in deep
And you think it will always be
But that is what barely alive means

I know the change I am
From the broken
And torn apart
Too hurt to be me

To the taking on my freedom
As it is worth it for me
You may think a lot of things
Doesn't mean it's true

Thoughts are just a creation
Most come from the past
And sometimes they are true
But often it is just a lie

If it is a negative thought
As I am sure it is
You can be sure it is a lie
A story told for a purpose

As you have told yourself time and again
You have listened to all your own fears
The box you live in will be seen
As you also need to breathe

You say so many things
But still it is all not so true
And I feel what I know
I have seen you feel it too

You would think
I would never change
You would not confuse
Love and me again

As what you have now
May not be real love
But that didn't work out
So it's all you have and better than not

As you couldn't be alone
Don't seem to know how
The floor at night still walks
All the past demons

And you would call me crazy
Or something to remove the attention
But the truth is there
And I read it and feel it

I know the difference
You make for me
I know the battle I lost
Trying to get over you

I know there are so many reasons
Why you stay away
But what can you say is really true?
As life can be what you want

I know you inside and out
I am free to see you as you are
I would have to say
I miss your hands the most

They are soft and gentle
What makes your guitar sing
Comfort and hold me
They give me pleasure

Nobody gets you as I do
Nobody can see you fully like I do
In their own way sure
But not like me

What a gift I am for you too
I am just starting to see
All the ways in which I am good for you
All the ways I love you right

You actually have no idea
As you have never even seen
Every moment from the past
Is just that past

I am this moment
And who I am is awesome
You just can't know
Cause you look away