Alone, used to it

I am used to being alone

I guess it shouldn't come as a shock
I mean we are born alone
We die alone
And we walk through the pits of hell alone

Many people often tell me that I am going to hell when I die
They tell me that God hates Lesbians
Some hide their hatred inside of meaningless quotes like
"God hates the sin not the sinner"
Well if being a Lesbian is a sin, then I am sin
As it is who I am
And the God they speak of, if he exists, can take his vengeance and go with them
As all I did was be born

But I think about their hell and if it would be better than mine
I wonder if it would be any different
The long ago, old feeling of wanting to die sits with me here
My own personal fiery pit

I think that in Homosexual Hell there might be a lot of others near
I am alone
But I am used to it
I can't ask for help
No one to hear

Who would I turn to
I was told to shut up
I was told to leave
I was told to stop yelling, stop talking
Go away

I am used to it
Don't want it anymore
This sick pit that I long for death
But I am used to it

Even my mother can't comfort me
She excuses her rage upon me
Don't I deserve more?
Didn't all I try and do was deal what was done to me
Why is everyone so mean?

I am deep inside now
I wish you could be near
I am ready for you to hold me
But I won't ask
I want to, but you've made yourself clear