Different is me

Different
Sure
I get it
I am

I am not like your next door neighbor
Not like Jane or Sam
I am just me
And that is just ok with me

But not ok for everyone
I feel so much like the world conspires to bring you down
Even if you don't do anything wrong
You still get shit upon

And I get it
Accept it so
I am not afraid to let anything go
I just thought I could move from the past

All I tried to do
But the past seems to last
Not done trying
I will not complain either

But I am saying how I feel
And here is my space
Here I get to let it go
And it doesn't go to waste

I put myself out for all the world to see
I get back only, "Will you fuck me?"
Be with me baby
Gorgeous will you friend me

I am not looking for these kinds of things
I want what is best for me
I don't need to weed through others drama
To find out that it didn't matter anyhow
I already know

But others get caught up in it
They say they don't
But actions tell the truth
Tales are told with words

And since it so
I will not continue to believe
That life is going to hand me a fucking thing
And not that I believed it would

I assure you
I work extra hard for everything I get
And still deal with all of their shit
But I accept it as it is so

What would be the best way to get people to see the real me
As being myself is still not the way
Not that I care
I am just saying

I feel so misunderstood most times
Like people stare at me with a confusing mind
I don't remember a time
That it all seemed to just be right

Right in my life
As it feels so fucking hard
But I am over that
So why do I still have the scars

I love, listen, support and care
I stand directly in the storm
I express myself with all my flare
And still I feel others are so unaware

Unaware of who I am
And I guess I understand
As it is just who they are that they don't get
It's not about me at all

But it makes me want to reach out and explain
What difference would it make
As people are not who they think
They get caught up in all the stink

And I choose a different way to see
I guess that is my crime
I won't fall down with them on their knees and cry
I say it will all be fine

I don't see the world in the same dark light
I see love, truth, and some misunderstandings
But I also know the only power I got
Is within me

And I watch so many
Give their power away to all the negativity
And they don't get that it is just about them
And with a tiny grin, they could make it all go away themselves

And it doesn't matter what happens in their space
EVERYTHING affects them
What a fucking waste
As it doesn't have to be this way

But so many chose it
In fact, I can't think of one who doesn't
Maybe two in my life might not get swayed
But they don't see life my way

Or when the shit hits the fan
I don't get caught up in it
I can look outside of the situation and see things
And I try and explain this

But it doesn't matter people don't want to deal with themselves
They only want to blame you
Even it hurts them too
Sad it is so

As I don't want to discuss how wronged they have been
I just say to them, "Let's talk about you and where you are"
I know too much to behave that way
And I suppose they get confronted and run away

So that leaves me where I've always been
And I guess the point is learning again
But maybe there might be a new kind of person
Who can understand me the way I am

Yet to see it
I have hard time believing it
But I think it is possible
And maybe I just might get it after all